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The following Featured Post comes from TV Series Group 9, Thread 5. 1. White Women & Black Men I'm going to step out onto a limb here..................... 2. White Women and Black Men Aphrodite, great subject and one that's close to my heart. As a white woman who does not fit the media ideal of beauty, I have struggled in the past with accepting myself as I am - full figured. I have dated men from various ethnic groups, but have found that AfAm and Hispanic men tend to have a greater appreciation of my physical gifts. I agree with you that AfAm men overall have a broader view of what constitutes physical beauty. I have also found that they tend to put more emphasis on inner beauty, instead of outer appearance. However, I don't think that black men are the *only* option for women who don't fit the mold. There are men of all races who are looking for a relationship based on things other than appearance, and many men who are attracted to full-figured women. Personally, I would not want to be involved with anyone who was so hung up on the physical appearance, because to me that indicates a basic shallowness of character. I try to understand why black women have an issue with white women dating black men, but I don't think I really do. It seema that the position of these women is that white women are taking away one of their prospective mates, Maybe I'm wrong, but isn't this making the assumption that your pool of prospective mates is limited to black men? I don't understand why someone would limit themselves in this manner. Is it possible that this could be a self-esteem issue? I recall reading a post from someone in another discussion group; a black woman stated that no white man would want to date her. My question would be, why would she assume that? I'd love to hear some feedback from black women on this (men too!) 3. White Women and Black Men I had to join this thread as like laura ca says it is close to my heart. I think that there are so many layers to a relationship. I am white and my husband is black. He grew up in a mostly white neighborhood and his best friends are Chinese. We are together first of all because we were attracted to each other and fell in love--not right away. We were friends first. We liked each other's independent, action oriented spirit. I dated a black guy in highschool back in the sixties and my first husband was white. Although I have been attracted to many different men, I know I really am drawn to dark hair, eyes and brown skin. My husband says the few times he dated black women they wanted to tell him how to run his life and he would rather have remained a bachelor instead of be in that kind of relationship. I think there are plenty of white women who would want to tell a man how to run his life! I do understand black women being sensitive to the issue. If they want a relationship with someone in their own race then they will see me as taking the options away since so many black men die younger, don't have opportunities for education and career, and end up in jail--all often due to the racism that still exists. Bottom line is I agree with what Cicily said in the series. Can't it be simply about two people falling in love? 4. White women, black men Very interesting Aphrodite! You could very well have written what you wrote on the "Change" site. You certainly have caught my attention. Yet, after reading all of the responses, I guess I don't have as much to say. But, I will say to Laura that yes, just like some white women, many black women prefer black men and black men only. I have been one of those women, but like I wrote in my latest response at the "Change" site, it has become clear that I will simply have to be more flexible. Thank you BB for understanding all of this. And, yes I do agree that it should simply be about two people falling in love. 5. White women, black men I don't understand why black women get upset about black men dating white women. My mother is one of those people. Her brother dated a white woman and had a baby with her. My mother's only comment was "I don't really approve of black men dating white women," and she never said another word about. The lady visited. My whole extended family accepted her. I never even heard my grandmother say anything negative about my uncle's girlfriend. But, in thinking about it more, I believe that my mother's own insecurities about her appearance had a lot to do with it. She is not the light-skinned black woman with long hair. I think that she experienced intra-racism with the AA community earlier in her life, and that has affected what she thinks about inter-racial relationships, especially black men-white women relationships. 7. white women, black men Wow! This thread has hit so may issues that are a part of my life, I don't really know where to start. I think there are lots of reasons why Black women have a hard time with Black men being with white women. I think it spans from blatent racism, to feeling abandoned, to living in a box, to case by case situations. 8. Malay Terrific post! Well said. Thank you. Read more featured posts here or continue reading thread 5 from TV Sereis Group 9. [an error occurred while processing this directive] |